Monday, December 24, 2012

Week 18: Feeling Reflective

Week 18: 12/16/12 - 12/22/12

This past week reminded there are many seasons in our lives. 

This month just so happened to be one of my tough seasons. 

It was draining physically and emotionally. 
Mostly physically, which in turn made me an emotional mess. 
Not to mention, trying to figure out the whole working-mom thing.
And doing it without any sleep. 

But just when I thought I truly could take no more, 
my "tough season" decided to add a little more. 

A clogged duct. 
Four month shots. 

A recipe for a bad week. 

Lyla's reflux symptoms returned.
I sort of forgot what it was like to have an upset baby. 
We are lucky to have a baby who rarely fusses.
Hardly ever cries. 
Let alone screams.

But this week, she screamed. 
And screamed.
And somewhere along the way, she developed real tears. 
And those tears made their appearance every day this week. 

We went through every burp cloth, outfit, and bib we own.
And Sweet Beans writhed and arched her back in pain.
Saddest thing I've seen in a long time. 
We actually spent one night switching off holding her with her belly on our shoulder while she screamed. 
For two hours straight.
She eventually cried herself to sleep. 
In my arms.
And I must admit, I was secretly happy that Ly wanted and needed lots of extra snuggles.
Hasn't slept in my arms since she was a newborn. 

We haven't seen her like this since she was 6 weeks old. 
When reflux was originally diagnosed. 

And then Friday we got four month shots. 
On the bright side, they were way better than 2 month shots. 
But still shots nonetheless. 

But the kicker of the week?
I got a seriously clogged milk duct. 
So bad that I was up all night trying to de-clog.
I tried everything from a hot bath, heating pad, pumping 3 times in the middle of the night, hand-expressing, massaging. 
Nothing worked. 
And it was clogged for 3 full days. 
Man it was painful. 
But it finally worked it's way free. 

Things can only go up from here though. 
I've got a week and a half home with my baby.
And she's slowly been feeling better every day.
And it's Christmas for Pete's sake.

I'm just hoping this new dosage of meds kick in. 
I want my happy baby back. 
I can't handle those crocodile tears.

Here's to hoping for a better season in the coming new year!!!


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Carolyn R said...

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that 2013 brings some easy months for you and your adorable family!! :) Happy new year friend!

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

Oh my goodness! I'm really hoping things are on the upswing for you guys!!