Monday, February 16, 2009

Top 10 ways NOT to get a job

On Friday, I returned home from a horribly unsuccessful career fair (in which will remain un-named.) And let me tell you, it was almost like these job searchers were looking to REPEL jobs. I'm serious. It was AWFUL!!! I mean, you would think during this incredibly rough economic time, people would be trying to put their best foot forward. Well, that was definitely not the case during my recent trip.

I decided to come up with a list of things NOT to do when looking for a job...ALL based on the incredibly odd things I witnessed at this career fair. NOTHING is exaggerated! Be prepared to be amazed. During this particular fair, they did open it up to the public...which may have been the reason for some of these faux pas.

Mrs. Ruby's Top 10 Ways NOT to Get a Job

1). Show up to a career fair with pink/purple/blue hair.

2). Completely understandable if you have tattoos and/or piercings. However with tattoos, try your hardest to cover them up...especially the naked lady on your arm. Oh, and I would strongly suggest you take out the 4 inch-in-diameter ring from your nose if trying to enter the corporate world.

3). Do NOT go to a career fair simply for the freebies. This.Is.Rude. A man actually walked up to our booth and said "I really love pens. I collect them. I have a cigar box full of hundreds of em'. Can I have one of yours?"

4). Don't walk up to a booth while still talking on your blue tooth headset. Seriously? This happened...a few times.

5). TRY not to bring your baby/clan of children with you to a career fair. Ok, this may seem heartless. I guess if you can't find a babysitter, then make sure your child is WELL-BEHAVED and do NOT put them on a leash. Under any circumstance. (Disclaimer: I love children, but not appropriate for a career fair. Would you bring them to an interview?)

6). Do not wear a tye die t-shirt, Birkenstocks, and peace sign earrings all while carrying a steaming cup of hot coffee in a homemade mug. I'm all about hippies, peace, and free-spirits...just not when looking for a job people!

7). Don't wear a Miller Light, Bud Light, Corona or ANY other alcoholic beverage baseball cap. Ever.

8). Don't approach an employer while sucking on a giant lollipop.

9). Do NOT say "I'm looking for ANYTHING I can get". Even if you're thinking this...it makes you look desperate.

10). Do not under ANY circumstance wear stonewash jeans, a glittery cardigan around your waste, and a belly shirt. This will definitely not help you get a job.

20 comments:

Lindsey said...

Haha! I can't believe people did these things!

Rachel said...

Too funny; definately don't do these things! LOL

Jane said...

oh my goodness. common sense here people! i would have lost it, if i were you! this is hilarious though, it should probably be published!!

Newlywed Next Door said...

This would be hilarious if it wasn't so sad. Seriously, what is wrong with people?! Lol.

Farnnay said...

wow.
i cant believe people actually did that. but then again, maybe they think its not an "interview" so they dont have to be formal. who knows the guy/girl with purple/pink/blue hair could totally knock your socks off.

Amber said...

Wow! People can be so dense sometimes...

Piper Jacquelyn said...

Oh good lord where did these people come from!? Horrifying. I think I would have packed up halfway through & bailed out! {PS..I hope that no one that reads your blog just read one of those tips & thought to themselves, oh, that's why I didn't get hired!}

Emily said...

too funny! I love all your favorite couples too... love them:)

Mrs. Potts said...

Awww - I always break out the stonewash for special interviews! So this is a no-no? :)
I wish it shocked me that people would do this.

Vodka Mom said...

11. Do NOT eat Mexican food the night before. They frown upon farting at job fairs.

Girl Meets Beau said...

Ha this is hilarious!! I can't believe people actually did this! Wow!

Also thanks for the sweet comments on my blog! It's much appreciated :)

Shoshanah said...

I think 8 is my favorite. I have a sweet tooth so, totally understandable. I mean once you start a lollipop its not like you can stick it in your purse. It might get a little sticky.
Why you decided to eat on at a job fair is my question? Although, was it perhaps a free lollipop some one was giving away?

Janine / Being Brazen said...

good advice...

Cant believe some people do those things - heehee

Barefoot in the Park said...

these folks make me look absolutely fabulous! perhaps bettering my odds?

thanks for stopping by!

Trina said...

So glad you found my blog! And I am glad I found yours. Very funny list and I can't believe the nerve of some people LOL

Interestingly, the word verification for this comment was "judgers". No lie.

Unknown said...

hahahaha... this is too funny!

Sweet Simplicity said...

Haha, I love this! I attend a lot of career fairs and I'm always apalled at what people are wearing. The worst is when they attend the med school interviews with stripper shoes and their boobs hanging out!

Elizabeth said...

This is absolutely hilarious! I can't believe this...people are so crazy! :)

LauraAnn said...

This is hilarious! Are some people born without that part of the brain that produces common sense?!? I don't mean to sound mean but people are stupid!

Valerie said...

Very funny!!!