You want a job...really?

I recently posted the Top 10 ways NOT to get a job.

I have a few more to add to my list. I swear I keep meeting people that are trying their absolute hardest NOT to get a job.

Yesterday, I hosted final interviews for my company. Let me set the mood. It's a fairly intense process. We fly candidates out. Set them up in a hotel. Take them to breakfast. Take them up to their interviews (that last an hour and a half total) where they interview with 3 VP's of the company. We take them up to our executive dining room (where jackets are required) and send them on their way.

So, I had to take around 3 candidates yesterday. Two of the three had arrived (the third was a local candidate in Boston). I tried calling him and when he answered I said "Name, are you still planning on attending your final interview this morning?" He mumbled something (I would soon find out that he mumbled just about everything he said) and stated that he was about 15 minutes away. He didn't apologize. He didn't sound frazzled. Ok, if this were me...I would be frickin sweating BULLETS!

So, I take the others to breakfast. When my third candidate shows up (we'll call him Mumbles) I think to myself "Oh dear Lord. I'm being Punk'd." He was THIRTY minutes late and still did NOT apologize!!! Mumbles walked in and looked like he hadn't even showered in a couple of days. Although he was wearing a suit, it looked like he just got it off his dorm floor.

At this point, we have 10 minutes until I have to take them up to their interviews. He mumbles "What's for breakfast?" in a very rude and demanding tone. I snidely mention, "Well, you should probably just grab a muffin." Mumbles heads to the table with his breakfast, demolishes the poor muffin by crushing it into mini crumbles and says with a scowl on his face "This muffin is really dry." (Meanwhile, muffin debris is flying all over the place...I think a soggy crumb even landed on my hand) Wow.

So, after the interviews, I go back up to meet the candidates and give them a tour of our facility. Along with making multiple stupid comments that I couldn't understand, Mumbles states "It smells like fish around here" And started laughing this horribly geeky, hideous laugh. Did I miss the joke?

Finally, after a very awkward morning, I take the candidates up to lunch in our Executive Dining Room. I can't even enter the dining room because I don't have access. Someone has to let us in. Again, jackets are required. And Mumbles proceeds to not only check his cell phone during lunch but he BURPED! He didn't even say excuse me.

Needless to say...Mumbles will DEFINITELY not be getting an offer. In fact, I don't have a clue how he even made it this far. Whoever interviewed him in the first place was on something, that's for sure.

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Happy Friday to everyone. I'm so excited because we're going skiing at the number 1 ski resort in Maine. I can't WAIT.

Thanks for all the sweet comments about my groin. I'm nursing it all day today. Hopefully I come off the slopes able to walk!

Can't wait to post pics...have a fabulous weekend!!!

OUCH - My groin!

No, this is not a racy, scandalous post. 

But my groin is in some serious pain.

I'm not quite sure what happened. I started running a few months ago and things have been going beautifully. But the groin started hurting a few days ago, and I ignored it. I ran. Every day. Two -Three miles at a time.

Now, my groin is punishing me. I spent about half my morning researching what to do for groin strains. However, my company's network security is stricter than the frickin CIA and when I typed into Google  something as innocent as "how to help a strained groin" - it got blocked for "tasteless information".

Oh well. I'm just hanging out with an ice pack and giving it some rest. Oh because did I mention that my groin HAS to heal before this weekend because we're going SKIING!!!

My groin is NOT going to thank me.

Weiner Wednesday

Good morning everyone!

I'm writing to you before work because I have an event tonight...and let's be honest, I'm procrastinating. I really just don't feel like going to work today. Nothing I'm dreading at work or anything, just REALLY don't feel like going.

Also, is anyone else getting the winter blahs? I mean, I feel like this winter has been dreadfully long. All I can think about is spring and all of its fun activities.

Well, I better go blow dry my hair. Although, I'd much rather go back upstairs and get in my comfy bed. This little doxie has the RIGHT idea!

Oscar Fashion Faves

I can't help it. I simply LOVE the fashion and frill of award shows. It's my weakness. I love all things classic, elegant and sparkly (not on the dress but on the neck, wrist and fingers...where anything sparkly should be!)

I love so many different styles, but I must say that my two new favorites are Kate Winslet and I absolutely ADORE Taraji Hensen (from the Curious Case of Benjamin Button). There were so many beautiful dresses from the show last night, it was hard to pick. But here are a few of my faves!

 

Oh...and can't forget Alicia! She looked STUNNING!

Likely Travel Neighbors

Well, I made it back from yet another trip. I was in Bloomington, IL to attend the Illinois State career fair. It was much more successful than the last one! I even got the chance to see one of my best buds from college who recently moved to Chicago. We had a fabulous time catching up and eating Mexican food and ice cream. :)

So, I'm one of those people who simply does not have good luck. With anything really. I never win...ever. The most awkward situations always find their way to me. I embarrass myself all the time. And I'm a medical anomaly - I've had some of the oddest medical issues that even doctors can't comprehend.  (We'll save that for another blog). So, it's safe to say that when I'm traveling, at least 2 of every 3 flights, it's inevitable for me to sit next to someone unenjoyable.

The following are a list of travel neighbors I've had the pleasure of sharing flights with. I'm sure with my luck, the list will continue to grow.

1). The Snorer - To wake him or not to wake him is the question. This is one of those situations where YOU actually start to feel embarrassed because the poor chap next to you is snoring so loud that people are glaring. Not to mention you can't even hear yourself think...let alone get any reading done.

2). The Talker - I've mentioned this before. When I fly, I like to either sleep or read. Notice that talking is not on my agenda. However, I often times get stuck next to individuals that have this undeniable desire to talk to me. About anything. Where they're going, their marriage, their job, their health problems, their 16th birthdays  etc. etc. These definitely make for long flights.

3). The Starer - You ever have that feeling when you just KNOW someone is staring at you? Try sitting next to that starer. I have. I had someone who looked over my shoulder while I read. So, I decided to take a nap. When I peeped one of my eyes open...he was STARING at me. SO creepy.

4). The Salesman - This may be the WORST of all. Yep, I think it is. I sat next to this man that spent our 2 and a half hour flight trying to first sell me wireless technology something-or-other. Then, he moved on to say "actually how would YOU like to work for me? I can guarantee you will make DOUBLE what you're making now." First of all, he had no idea how much I made. Secondly, he wore elastic polyester pants and velcro shoes. I'm not about to 1. buy anything from this man 2. DEFINITELY not even THINK about working for this man.

5). The Sickie - I've sat next to plenty of neighbors who hacked and sneezed...all over me. This of course is why I devoutly take my EmergenC before any flight. I'm not kidding, one time my neighbor sneezed, and I felt a snot droplet on my hand. Sick. Literally.

6). The Scaredy-Cat - Haha. This one is actually sort of humorous. I've sat next to a couple of people who were scared to death of flying. They kept gasping, squealing and would often times forget to breathe. Oh, and one of them kept putting her arms out as if to protect herself from falling. I actually had one colleague who sat next to a Scaredy-Cat that held his HAND the entire flight. How awkward!

7). The Smelly-Cat - Unfortunately, I've had the Smelly-Cat a few too many times. Even on my last flight. This is a person who simply has not bathed...maybe ever. I had one that smelled like cigarettes dipped in poo. I thought I was going to gag for an entire hour and a half.

8). The Drunk - The name says it all. You know, that person sitting next to you who has about 7 too many bourbon and sodas. The one who starts sitting on the man behind her, yelling at the girl across from her, slurring and cursing like a sailor. Yeah, I think we've all experienced that one.

I'm off...yet again!

Well, I'm off to my next destination. Should be a bit more successful than my last trip because we've been to this fair before and have always found a ton of qualified candidates.

I'll be back to the blogging world in just a couple of days...can't wait to update you with (hopefully) some more fun travel stories. :)

Top 10 ways NOT to get a job

On Friday, I returned home from a horribly unsuccessful career fair (in which will remain un-named.) And let me tell you, it was almost like these job searchers were looking to REPEL jobs. I'm serious. It was AWFUL!!! I mean, you would think during this incredibly rough economic time, people would be trying to put their best foot forward. Well, that was definitely not the case during my recent trip.

I decided to come up with a list of things NOT to do when looking for a job...ALL based on the incredibly odd things I witnessed at this career fair. NOTHING is exaggerated! Be prepared to be amazed. During this particular fair, they did open it up to the public...which may have been the reason for some of these faux pas.

Mrs. Ruby's Top 10 Ways NOT to Get a Job

1). Show up to a career fair with pink/purple/blue hair.

2). Completely understandable if you have tattoos and/or piercings. However with tattoos, try your hardest to cover them up...especially the naked lady on your arm. Oh, and I would strongly suggest you take out the 4 inch-in-diameter ring from your nose if trying to enter the corporate world.

3). Do NOT go to a career fair simply for the freebies. This.Is.Rude. A man actually walked up to our booth and said "I really love pens. I collect them. I have a cigar box full of hundreds of em'. Can I have one of yours?"

4). Don't walk up to a booth while still talking on your blue tooth headset. Seriously? This happened...a few times.

5). TRY not to bring your baby/clan of children with you to a career fair. Ok, this may seem heartless. I guess if you can't find a babysitter, then make sure your child is WELL-BEHAVED and do NOT put them on a leash. Under any circumstance. (Disclaimer: I love children, but not appropriate for a career fair. Would you bring them to an interview?)

6). Do not wear a tye die t-shirt, Birkenstocks, and peace sign earrings all while carrying a steaming cup of hot coffee in a homemade mug. I'm all about hippies, peace, and free-spirits...just not when looking for a job people!

7). Don't wear a Miller Light, Bud Light, Corona or ANY other alcoholic beverage baseball cap. Ever.

8). Don't approach an employer while sucking on a giant lollipop.

9). Do NOT say "I'm looking for ANYTHING I can get". Even if you're thinking this...it makes you look desperate.

10). Do not under ANY circumstance wear stonewash jeans, a glittery cardigan around your waste, and a belly shirt. This will definitely not help you get a job.